you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
