So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize