about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
