the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
