And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Naked Twister starts at high noon
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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