is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
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