I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
