I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
she pinky promised me she was 18
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
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