can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Randomize
