dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
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