so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
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