I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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