I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
