Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
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