where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize