She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
try to milk me bitch
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