The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Randomize
