Sry I called you an 8
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
