I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
