My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize