I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize