Where are you?
In a non slutty way
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Randomize
