Sponge bath it is.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
