She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
