wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
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