why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
