How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
