Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
