Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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