Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Randomize
