she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
The power of my boobs compel you
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
