Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I just pynch a tree in the face
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
