yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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