Dude, I just rear-ended a cab
Are you drunk?
A little...yes
Run!
Terrible brother advice.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
