I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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