So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
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