So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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