I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Are we in a gay sports bar?
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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