careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
