you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
There was a lot of him and a little penis
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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