Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
