I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
i think i have herpe
just one?
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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