So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
