told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Randomize