so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
