i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Randomize
