Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Randomize
