You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
look no pants
Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
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