Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Randomize
