so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Randomize
