well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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