I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
